I Have Upset the Neighbors

I have done something to really upset the new neighbors.

I have no idea what it could have been. Well, I have lots of ideas. But I don't know which one it could be.

It's pretty serious. Even though we were here when they moved in, the dogs bark at us constantly. Anytime they see us indoors or out. The two people never come out to quiet the dogs. When the husband passes me walking on the road, he scowls heavily and looks away. We have only seen the wife once - she has never come back outside to say hello.

If you live in some suburb somewhere, you may not understand how serious this is. Here in New Mexico, most people would just as soon chat with you for a half hour as look at you. We have one friend who can't use a cordless phone because the batteries wear out in what she considers the middle of a conversation - about an hour in. When we go for a walk along any well-traveled road, our arms get more exercise waving than our legs do walking.

Normal New Mexicans are just friendly folk. Yes, some people from Los Alamos can get pretty cranky, but they are probably not natives, just imports that work at the lab. And drivers in Albuquerque may be no better than Los Angelans with longer range weapons. But normal New Mexicans have time to discuss how George Bush is a monster, or how he is saving our country from godless liberals. And we have social nexuses (WWWebster says that is the plural, honest), like the volunteer fire department, the homeowners association, and the neighborhood bridge society, where we have a reason to get out at odd hours to talk some more.

So, it's serious. And an overactive guilt gland somewhere in my brain keeps secreting all sorts of reasons they could be upset.

Did I forget one day, and pee in our yard where they could see out the window? It's possible. Though our house has a big yard and lots of trees, I can't find anywhere convenient outside to pee where I can't be seen from someone else's window. Maybe one day I was careless. Maybe these neighbors are repulsed by open-air peeing. Maybe that's it.

Or do they think I am a peeping Tom? I know when they first came back (they were living in Nevada while trying to sell their house), I kept looking over there to see if anyone was coming out to say hello. I did get the feeling they were watching me all the time! Maybe they were, and they got upset I might be watching them back when I was the one outside in public view and they were inside in privacy. Possible.

But then, it could be I passed him too fast on the way to work in the morning. Or, maybe I was driving too slow and held him up too long before pulling off to let him pass. Either is possible here. Many people are offended by being passed on the mountain roads. Many other people are offended by how slow people go on the mountain roads - and they don't help make it easy to pass! My problem is that I am in the middle, so I have both fast and slow people upset at me. I do try to pull over, or slow down in passing zones, to help the fast people get by. And I don't come up behind people with my brights on, or really fast. But some people are easily offended by others' driving. Perhaps that's what's got his shorts in a knot.

But I have been thinking. The husband was working at Nevada Test Site for the lab. I bet he came back here and was told by some lab employee I have pissed off (there seem to be many) that I am a real jerk. Especially if he works for one of the explosives groups. I keep sticking my nose into their business, not knowing that they have not blown anyone up in a very long time, so there is no chance they would ever blow anyone up. They are pretty smart people. Yup, another likely reason he acts like I am a leper.

Oh, no. Maybe he heard that I had warned a potential buyer to get the house inspected to make sure none of the odd problems we saw when we looked at the house were serious. (Just maybe he does not like people that write long sentences?) I am not getting any closer here.

It's also possible they are offended by black plastic. Our firewood is covered with it, and most of the firewood is near our common property line. My wife is offended by black plastic (but is more offended by getting cold in the winter), so maybe they feel imposed-upon by my firewood. They don't have firewood. Maybe that's the problem! Do they think I should offer them some of our bounteous supply? No, whew. I remember the one time we talked he said they don't have a stove. But that may be because they don't like burning wood, and we burn a lot. Am I getting warm, do you think?

I've tossed out the idea that they are Christian Scientists and believe that when we go out on rescue calls we should not be carrying bandages and splints so much as a Bible and kneeling pads. No, that's really out there. So is the cat. I can't believe our house's cat is hanging out in their yard with those barking dogs and bothering them. The cat is too busy hanging out here bothering me. Definitely not the cat. And I don't think it's our local bridge society. There are only a few people that think playing cards is sinful, and the neighbors were living in Nevada. That can't be it.

My mind is just reeling with the possibilities. Was I reeling outside, or near a window they could see, and they think I am a drunk? Or, should I have offered them a drink when they moved in? I don't think I'll know soon, since they are not just not talking, they are avoiding eye contact. No defrosting of the situation appears imminent. Maybe I should just go drink some beer, have a nice pee outside, then alternately speed and crawl in to work and make unjustified demands on the lab. I'll keep an eye on them and see what they react to.